Expectations Frame Perspective

The way we view events is often affected by our expectations.  It can be as simple as a storm which we see on the horizon.  We note the amount of lightening and the darkness of the color and think, "That's going to be a bad one."  Once it is over, we pass judgment with words such as, "That wasn't as bad as I expected," or, "Man, that was worse than I thought!"

On a slightly larger scale, our expectations affect our view of climate change.  Flooding in the Midwest this year is an example.  Those who are staunch believers that we are experiencing extreme weather events as the result of climate change see the flooding as a result of that change.  Those who are more skeptical, see the flooding as part of the cyclical nature of the world and point out historic flooding in times past.

What we fail to realize is that the same issue of expectations affects us in many other ways.  If we expect conflict to develop in a family gathering, it likely will do so simply because of how it affects perception of things said, or done.  That perception evokes reaction and the conflict begins.

It happens on social media too.  When we see a post from someone who typically thinks very differently than we do -- such as those of the opposite political persuasion -- we tend to react to it in a polarizing fashion rather than actually thinking about what they posted.  We immediately think, "stupid" liberal, or "ignorant" conservative rather than considering what they are really trying to say.  Admittedly, many such posts are meant to be somewhat provocative, but there is always an intellect of some kind behind them which is saying, "This expresses what I am thinking."

In business we often don't realize that a similar thing occurs.  When we present an idea, or a plan, we do so with expectations that the audience will see it the way we do.  That isn't always the case and we are faced with rejection.  Most people respond to rejection defensively.  The correct response is to be inquisitive.  Until you truly understand what is behind their rejection, you cannot effectively formulate a plan that will be successful, or frame your idea in such a way that it is understood.  We fail to clearly communicate because we are caught up in our own expectations.

Sometimes, our expectations get in the way of our success.  They cloud our ability to understand.  Our first response to rejection needs to be a question; "What is it that I don't understand?"