Tuesday, May 8, 2007

Bored -- No Extremes

For years, my guitar was my escape. I could go in my room, shut the door, and become completely absorbed into the music. I would sit and play and sing for hours at a time. I probably knew well over 100 songs by heart.

Sometimes I would be in the mood to write music. I have no idea how many songs I've written through the years. They are tucked into files and notebooks and desk drawers or lying loose in my guitar case. I don't know if I've written a hundred songs, but probably at least fifty.

It seems that for the last few years it has been very difficult to get in the mood to play music, let alone to write music. Music comes from the heart. My heart hasn't been in it.

The mood to play or write music seems to be tied to extremes. When I am happy, I play music. When I am melancholy or despondent, I write music. The writing is a release. It usually lifts me from my despondency.

I think that I have fallen into a rut of complacency; that is why the music doesn't hold me in thrall the way it does when the emotional pendulum is at an extreme. Perhaps it is a warning sign. Maybe extremes are designed to recharge us.

In a way, it's like the diversity around us -- both in nature and in humanity. It would certainly be boring if it was all the same. Without the swings, we would probably die of boredom.


Incognito said...

Interesting way to look at it, but do you want to be a slave to your extremes? But it's fine as long as you don't mind playing when you're happy and writing when you're melancholy.

And I agree it would be very boring if everything was all the same.

bigwhitehat said...

So is it that your heart aint in it?
Or is your heart into something else?

Panhandle Poet said...

A very good question BWH -- I'll have to ponder on that one.

Incognito -- I think we're all slaves to something. But I don't really think it's the emotions in this case. It's probably purely choice of how to find realease.

Incognito said...

Well, our priorities and interests do change. The 'energy' we felt for something can dissipate and it's truly okay to let it go. Oftentimes people don't allow themselves to move on. Not that you're doing this.

I think that as soon as I feel the energy has died for my acting, I will move on without looking back.

MotherPie said...

WE all need our hobbies and interest to add spice to our lives and where we can let our talents play out and lose ourself, find that groove.

The best thing we can do with children is teach them to find their talents and the special things that make them unique.

How many people can find adult outlets as a release when you grew up thinking that playing football was the spare time endeavor? I encouraged my husband to learn to play the guitar at 40. He is quite good now and plays almost daily.

It is easy to get caught up with day-to-day chores and duties.